No TV for Bolton v West Ham?

What's this? You mean to tell me that Bolton, the most stupefyingly boring team in English football, isn't a big TV draw? Pretty much every other Premier League fixture seems to be on US TV this weekend, but I can't find Bolton v West Ham anywhere. So, I guess it's Foxsoccer.tv, some stream or the ignominy of  a Soccernet "game tracker" for fans of the Claret and Blue this weekend. Hooray.

I don't want to talk about what happened against Manchester United. Yes, I know that this blog is here pretty much solely so that I (and you, the faithful reader) can talk about that sort of thing, but I don't want to talk about it. The whole thing was just such a complete mess. Plus, I hate Wayne Rooney, and I hated him even before he buried us in the second half last weekend. So, let's move on to...Bolton?

Ugh, Bolton. What a horrible excuse for a football club. Park-the-bus, clatter-and-run claptrap. It's the antithesis of what West Ham stand for (or should), and yet Bolton never seem too bothered by the threat of relegation, whereas we constantly seem to be fighting to stay up. Well, I'd rather watch us go down fighting with some modicum of style than watch us float to safety by playing Bolton's stultifying football version of the 1990s New Jersey Devils' neutral-zone trap. (Sorry, I've been watching a lot of hockey lately.) I think I mean that. Just don't ask me if I do should we actually go down this season. Right now, I'm standing on my football principles, but in a way I'm secretly glad that I might not have to watch the match this Saturday. Freaking Bolton.

COYI